Tricky Toddlers

My three year old girl, “Princess”, is generally well behaved but has a few tricks up her sleeve.

The other day I noticed her sitting in the pantry, I looked in but she didn’t seem to be doing anything. A little while later she went back in there and again I couldn’t see anything she was eating but thought I should investigate further. After some searching I found a hidden juice box that I almost missed because she had stored it behind some boxes. We then had a little talk about asking mommy’s permission. While one juice box isn’t a big deal there are things she shouldn’t be eating and if she hides more stuff from me it could be dangerous.

Sometimes when I’ll tell her not to do something she tries to get her 1 year old sister to do it anyway. While I try to be discipline them equally, I think Princess has caught onto the fact that Sweet Pea gets away with things because she’s too young to understand.

Sweat Pea can open our front door if it’s unlocked so we always keep it locked. But if Princess wants to go outside she’ll just unlock the door and tell Sweet Pea  to open it. When I get mad at her she tries to argue that it was Sweet Pea’s fault.

It’s not just limited to her sister though, we had a playdate the other day and Princess found another juice box (can you tell she’s not allowed to drink them very often?) to play with on her pretend picnic. I told her she could play with it if she didn’t open it. She then handed it to her friend and asked him to open it. I then asked him nicely not to open it either. Then right in front of me she whispers to him, “open it!” And now the juice boxes are going to be stored higher!

I’m not sure if I should take these sneaky tricks as a sign that Princess is a genius or future manipulative teenager. I can’t even imagine the trouble I’m in when Sweet Pea is old enough to be a co-conspirator!

2 Going on 13

Princess is about to turn three in August but sometimes it seems like she is about to turn 13. Her love of fashion and dressing up is well documented. She already asks to put on my make-up and likes sunglasses and purses. All very cute things that girls of all ages like. But recently we’ve experienced the attitude of a teenager.

When I send her to her room for disobedience or other incidences she slams her bedroom door and yells out “Fine!”. It’s a good thing she can’t see me laughing. It’s much harder to keep a straight face when she rolls her eyes at me. I thought I had a few more years before experiencing attitude like this. Another thing she does is over-exaggerate and act like we are the worst parents ever. When I stop her from doing something she indignantly cries out “You Never Let Me Insert activity here“.  She knows how to manipulate us and likes to tease us by saying “I don’t love you”

At least we don’t have to worry about boys yet because she has announced that she is going to marry Dora the Explorer. If this is what almost 3 looks like I’m scared for 13.

American Idol- Bikini Girl

I spent two hours last night watching the American Idol. It was fun to see all 13 semi-finalists again. I won’t even try to comment on who should have won since I’m tone deaf and can’t really tell who is singing well. I was surprised that Kris won but after thinking about it, it makes more sense. The Danny Gokey fans would have naturally switched their votes over to him. Also, I think that Adam is a polarizing contestant. People either loved him or hated him. I suspect there were a lot of votes for Kris just so Adam wouldn’t win. Or possibly Adam did not want to win so he wouldn’t be tied down to an American Idol recording and asked friends and family not to vote.

One part I remember very well is when the Bikini girl was given an award. It’s so sad that I don’t even know her name. Sure, appearing in a biking for the audition is a good way to get noticed. But wouldn’t she rather get noticed for her voice? Save the bikini for America’s Next Top Model. Thankfully, she didn’t make it too far but was invited back to the finale. I couldn’t believe she came out in a bikini again. Is that how she wants to be remembered for the rest of her life? Why was she willing to put up with the embarrassment just to be on a show? And it looks like she has had implants. As if she didn’t have a good enough body to begin with. Doesn’t she know that the boobs will get messed up once she has kids and it could impact her ability to breastfeed? She already had a body that most women would kill for but obviously still felt inferior.

Then Kara came out to sing. A smart woman who can write and sing. When she whipped open her dress at the end to show her bikini she immediately tried to cover up her body again. Why is she so embarrassed of her body? It looked fabulous, especially considering she’s 38. I don’t know many woman who look that good in their 20’s.

Why are these two beautiful women not satisfied with their bodies? It makes me worried for my girls in the future. They are going to be bombarded with images of super-thin models and airbrushed images. How can I ensure that they have a healthy self-esteem? Sadly, I already have to do deal with this on a small scale. Princess likes to watch me put make up on. She always asks for it and sometimes I oblige. Other times I tell her that she doesn’t need it, she’s already beautiful. I’m dreading the day when she asks me why I wear make-up. How do I explain that I need make-up to feel pretty? How can I expect her to be happy with her face and body when I rely on a product to fix myself? And I know that there are going to be tougher questions coming as they grow up. Somehow I need to teach them that looks are not everything and that while looks fade, character doesn’t.

Raising girls is complicated. If you have any suggestions on promoting healthy self-esteem or books on the subject, please let me know.